The challenges I had in my life were numerous.
I come from a very average family. We had food on the table. We had the hand me down clothes. To aspire for a change in life meant I needed to work harder than I ever did.
So I did.
I worked hard at school for 5 years to get myself eligible for a scholarship.
I faced failure after failure to get a decent grade to be able to continue for a degree.
I worked hard to get my postgraduate scholarships.
Went through so much downs and still I stood up again to just finish what I started.
I stand here now thinking if I did all that why is it so hard to do this one thing.
To forgive the unforgivable. My insides are all in pain. I want to set myself free. I want to forgive. I want to move on.
Lord God in all my travels and adventure I never stopped talking to you. Today more than any other time I implore you to help me forgive.
I come from a very average family. We had food on the table. We had the hand me down clothes. To aspire for a change in life meant I needed to work harder than I ever did.
So I did.
I worked hard at school for 5 years to get myself eligible for a scholarship.
I faced failure after failure to get a decent grade to be able to continue for a degree.
I worked hard to get my postgraduate scholarships.
Went through so much downs and still I stood up again to just finish what I started.
I stand here now thinking if I did all that why is it so hard to do this one thing.
To forgive the unforgivable. My insides are all in pain. I want to set myself free. I want to forgive. I want to move on.
Lord God in all my travels and adventure I never stopped talking to you. Today more than any other time I implore you to help me forgive.
Comments
My other friend said forgive but do not forget. Sigh.. I miss the times when all there was to forgive was a misunderstanding.
Gallivanter, Zan.. I am still trying.. everyday..
At some point in life, you have got to make decisions for yrself, first and foremost. Selfish, yes, but you are d one that will have to live with yrself.
Picture yrself 5 years down d road. Are u going to say then that you didnt do this and this and wish that u had d guts?
Whats yr level of strength? Are u strong enough for yrself, and yr boys? Does the presence of the other person make a difference, or none at all? Answer these, and I'm fairly certain you'd find yr answer in turn.
Nothing in life is so bad it can kill u. Cliche, but it is so very true.
Carpe diem!
Decisions take time. I have made soo much decisions since then and reached this point.. and all I need to do is forgive to set myself free.. and thanks for the comment.. well taken in.. strange that most people think alike in problem solving.
Nothing is life is easy but by facing the music, it looks easy to others.. :)
whatever decision u gotta make, i pray that it will allow you to breathe easily and stays that way for a very long time.
*hugs*
And no, you do not know me. That I'm sure. See me as someone who's watching a young woman hurting and not knowing how to stop the pain.
*hugs*
*hugs*
And Thanks Anonymous person.. what you said rings very true..
I know I can be alone.. and being lonely is really challenging.. but I try to love my lonely times.. coz in the long run.. it is when i am lonely that these lovely friends come along.. :)
And about forgeting... I really like your words "but to forget what you had to forgive for in the first place is you doing injustice to yrself."
that is the wisest thing I ever heard in my life..